The flight of the Kingfisher.

The kingfisher has flown the coop. The Attorney General informed the Supreme Court yesterday that Vijay Mallya left the country on 2 March, still owing Rs 90 billion to a bunch of banks in India. Of course, he did. Same as India's best friend, Ottavio Quattrocchi left Delhi for Kuala Lumpur in July 1993 even though the pay-offs in the Bofors case came to light in 1987. Billions of rupees makes lots of friends. For us, ordinary folks the case is hilarious because none of it makes sense. For instance, no one seems to know where Mallya is? With his distinctive hairstyle Mallya is instantly recognisable. A man of his flamboyance is not going to fly anything less than first class, fussed over by flunkeys, which will be clearly visible on CCTV footage in the airport, so his destination should be obvious from the flight he boarded. If he flew by private jet, its flight plan will have been filed and a few phone calls should reveal where it landed. A non-bailable arrest warrant was issued for him in October 2012 so he should not have been roaming around. In 2014 he was granted bail on a criminal charge of tax evasion for a sum of Rs 100,000 in cash and Rs 100,000 bond, for a grand total of Rs 200,000. This for a man who had already defaulted on loans of over Rs 70 billion to various banks. Contrast this to Subroto Roy who will remain in prison unless he pays Rs 100 billion towards his bail. Note what Mallya said,"I have been most pained as being painted as an absconder - I have neither the intention nor any reason to abscond. I have been a non-resident for almost 28 years and the Reserve bank of India acknowledged this in writing." We understand. When he left India he was only going home to wherever he lives and so cannot be described as an absconder. What does non-resident mean? Does it mean that he still carries an Indian passport but spends over 180 days outside the country, or that he is a citizen of a foreign country. If everyone knew that he is a non-resident why did they not impound his passport? Mallya struck a deal with Diageo which agreed to pay him $75 million as severance package, $40 million immediately and $35 million in installments over 5 years, and drop all criminal charges against him. The stock exchange regulator, Sebi has suddenly woken up to Mallya's naughty behavior, the same Sebi which has been implacable in the Subroto Roy case. Some 3,000 employees are still claiming Rs 3 billion in unpaid salaries. No doubt they will be paid with taxpayer money just before some elections. The money could have been much better utilised to restructure the airlines so that it remained viable when over Rs 222 billion has been wasted on the bottomless pit of Air India. Under no circumstance should the government try to extradite Mallya back to India. We do not want a repeat of the Quattrocchi carousel where our fearless sleuths ran to all the fleshpots of the world, costing billions of rupees, only to drop all charges. Curious goings on, isn't it? Alice would have recognised it.